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"The third group will live, it will thrive, it will prevail, and without the aid of machines. It’s blessed, chosen. This group too is already set apart, doing well in the world of the present, rich and happy."

If this is indeed your path Walter, I know you will use your time wisely. You have already enriched the lives of so many. I, for one, am glad I found you, your random thoughts + musings scattered about the internet, your podcasts with Matt, County Highway and your writing here on Substack. It has saved me during these strange and sometimes awful times. I bet there are more subscribers here that would say the same. Happy Thanksgiving. Travel Safe...

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Nov 20, 2023Liked by Walter Kirn

Dear Walter,

You may not be aware, but you have a great voice full of expression and wonder. Please consider making your stories available in audio (with you reading of course). Many people spend their day reading at work and at the end of the day it is great to be able to relax and just listen, and with your voice, would be even more entertaining. Maybe a survey is in order? I apologize in advance if this request has in any way been an inconvenience. Sincerely, Nori

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author

I will record this later today and send it out. Good idea

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You have a cool hair cut also.

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You reading it would be fantastic. The machine lady voice doesn’t pronounce Matt's name correctly. She says it, “tie bye” 🙄. And monotone as well. Substack needs to fire her.

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As a middle-schooler, a friend and I would routinely scare ourselves shitless at sleepovers by listening to an LP of Vincent Price reading the collected works of Edgar Allen Poe . The sound of your voice, especially your laughter, takes me back to 5th grade. So your recent review of “The Fall of the House of Usher” was especially delightful. Thanks for the memories…

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Wonderful and entertaining story, thank you Walter. The guy was obviously paying attention to where we're at in our human journey. Also I loved the gypsy van photo or whatever it is. Honestly I'm not sad to face my end in the next few years, turning 78 in December. Things out there are looking pr3etty scary to me. Maybe it's my age but at least I don't have asthma!

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In 2013, my mother told me, at age 80, she was too old for this world. I’ve been feeling that way for the past 3 years. I’m 63.

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Millenials and iGen and younger don't own the world Sue B - it just seems this way because they get so much publicity. At 63 - you own the world - you're just getting warmed up.

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Aw thank you Jim. It does feel that way. I should take your reply and hang it on my wall. 💕

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I'm 75, and fighting like hell!

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I hope you are right, turning 61 next month and I can relate to SueB’s sentiment.

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I am 53 and I can relate too already.

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We are the lucky ones. Do you remember being told to stay outside and play all day, only being allowed to return before the street lights came on? Making your fun with discarded cardboard boxes which could become a car, a house, a fort, or a spaceship? No batteries required. Do you remember when the whole family went over “to visit” with the neighbors, pretty much all of the families on the street at one time or another?

We are lucky because that neighborhood for me is now one of the most violent cities in the country, and it will never go back to the way it was. Pity the young; they missed all the good stuff.

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I'm probably one of the youngest people to grow up the way you describe. Coming of age without being tethered to a phone, and having parents who understood that I needed to develop independence. I see so little of myself in those just a few years younger, and have a harder time relating to them than people 40 years older than me. And you're right, it's not good for them, they are not happy.

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I too loved the photo, it gave me a feeling of warmth and familiarity, although I can not explain why. Happy early birthday Bonnie, many more to you.

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74 here. I feel the same, Bonnie.

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A gifted wordsmith may find a novel or screenplay in this story.

A silver tongued charlatan might use it to form a new religion.

For myself it is a fine bedtime story that could inhabit my dreams.

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Nov 20, 2023Liked by Walter Kirn

Although not a comment directly on the story, but rather a comment on the comments...I think a good many of us like to recall the "good old days" and are concerned about the future for our children. It actually weighs quite heavy on me from time to time; however, my spirits were lifted on the subject the other day upon reading a post by a friend. It read, "Don't feel sorry or fear for your kids because the world they are going to grow up in is not what it used to be. God created them and called them for the exact moment in time the they are in. Their life wasn't a coincidence or an accident." I do still wish my son could have experienced the 70s carefree childhood that I enjoyed, but I think he will look back on his childhood with fondness.

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Let us hope, M. Palmer.

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...hamburger with pepper jack cheese, candied bacon, and pickled jalapenos...😋😋😋

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Pepper jack is the best!

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Personally, I was more excited about the candied bacon (almost no bacon in Turkey, besides Istanbul where you can get pretty much anything) and the pickled jalapenos. I live with my wife in Izmir Turkey and we eat TONS of Tulum cheese which is now my favorite (never had before 2019) and there are tons of pickled vegetables over here also. Never knew about Kefir either, now I drink at 1-2 liters a week. In America, at least in Publix's in Florida, I have never seen kefir. My wifey pickles a lot of thins for us also. But yeah that doesn't stop pepper jack from being very yummy.

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Publix does indeed have Kefir milk! The blueberry is especially yummy. My dogs love it too!

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Yes I meant that but obviously I didn't word it correctly.

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Kefir is getting popular in the states now!

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Very intriguing. It brings to mind that Twilight Zone episode when the criminal is killed by cops and thinks he went to heaven, because he got everything he wanted, whenever he wanted it. Turns out, it was hell.

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Sounds like America right now

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21st century Bradbury - thank you Mr. Kirn.

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Nov 20, 2023Liked by Walter Kirn

Thanks for this story, Walter. I’ve been listening to you and Matt since you started your collaboration. It’s one of the highlights of my week....sadly, for me. I am one who enjoys the second half as much as the week in review. I was an English major in college, and had already read some of the stories you review. I couldn’t help but notice the multiple times you’ve mentioned your age, and we are contemporaries. The funny thing is, and no offense, Walter, you seem older than me. It’s not you, it’s me. I have this F’d up view of myself that I’m younger than I am. Having said that, and this story only reinforces it - I’m glad I don’t have a ton of years ahead of me (sorry, but that means you don’t either). The machines are too damn good at this, and they are systematically eating away at those with potential, a future, at least as measured by their age and raw intellect. There is no turning back, no rapture, no transcendent force coming to save us. The third way people will need to detach, find a place in Montana, or better yet, Manitoba, or something. Return to to the earth, and separate from most folks. Sad, really. Have a great Thanksgiving while you enjoy your confirmation of third way status.

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Right there with you Doug, hang in there!

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Hmmm. Lots of homeless here in Bozo. Happy to not be one of them. They own trailers but can’t afford a space. I get it.

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founding

I’m afraid this isn’t really a story. Sounds like something that would happen to you ❤️. I hope we steer well enough that the first are the last.

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Nov 20, 2023Liked by Walter Kirn

This dude was doing some serious drugs...I suspect Ketamine, given the detail & weirdness of his musings. I hope he’ll go on to use his powers for good. Just as you have, Walter. Thanks for the chuckle!

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My guess is heavy amphetamine use and Lovecraft

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founding

Entertaining and thoughtful story. Thanks

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Nov 20, 2023·edited Nov 20, 2023Liked by Walter Kirn

I enjoyed that, Walter. Many thanks.

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Only Walter K. could take such a ordinary interaction and turn it into a interesting, well written story.

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Whoa, what a good short story… Really shortest of the short. And the punchline is at the very end. Fear and loathing in Las Vegas Walter and Matt needs to check this out! Maybe not Hunter but a good one👍

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